Monday Afternoon Sabbatical -June 24, 2013

Week three of my Summer 2013 Sabbatical contained so many highlights, it is difficult to single out any particular one.  So many thoughts as I reflect upon this past week.  In no particular order.....

Humbled by the response to my Father's Day post, 'Forgetting Your Father on Father's Day.'  Most of the comments came directly via email, and not through the CoffeeShop Pastor Blog -and I can understand why.  It seems that many of us carry a Father Wound that even years later still affects us to various degrees.  I can not offer any great wisdom or insight, save for the fact that freedom can be found.  It is tough work, maybe life-long work; but healing is possible.

Monday Night I accompanied Southbrook Church member Mark J. to New Creatures in Christ Church's Monday Night Bible Study. NCCC is a central-city Church located near 46th and Capital Ave.  I felt blessed to be with brothers and sisters from an area of Milwaukee that is all to easily overlooked.  Again I was reminded at how much greater God's Kingdom is than the small slice of Church that I know.

Here's a thought that hit me this past week.  We tend to see levels of complexity when viewing ourselves; but when we see others, we tend to view them in simple binary terms.  Why is this?

We were honored to attend a pre-launch breakfast at the Mad Rooster Cafe on 43rd and Greenfield Ave, just South of Miller Park.  Wow, what a cool place to grab breakfast and lunch!  This was a great family experience....

Lynn and I took a meal over to Kevin and Mary Jo, and enjoyed our time with them.  They recently gave birth to twin boys, and a few weeks after delivery, Mary Jo found out that she had CML, a form of Leukemia.  She is doing well, though the medications and treatments are difficult.  Their faith is placed in the belief that God is in control, and remains in charge even when life seems unfair.

A friend sent me a text message about our church picnic, with some accompanying photos.  Looked like a good time was had by all, though it was somewhat odd to be missing this delightful Church event!

Lynn decided it was high time to re-stain our deck, which turned out to be a tougher project than originally anticipated.  Working together benefits any relationship for sure.  Tough, yes.  Frustrating, certainly.  Rewarding, thoroughly!

Capped the week off with an all-too-rare family meal at my mother's house in Union Grove, WI.  In the photo above you see me and my two brothers.  Nathan is on the left and he is the oldest.  A highly successful web designer/entrepreneur, Nathan and his wife and two daughters live in Illinois as well as Florida.  Joel is the youngest and is a police officer in Troy, Ohio.  He and his wife have four children. Every other year or so, our schedules all align and we are able to get together.

Each family has tension, and ours in no exception. But for our family the animosity lies in the fact that I hit the trifecta: height, looks and great hair!

How To Spend $25,750 on Your Home Deck Re-Staining Project

So with little planning and far less skill, Lynn and I decide to re-stain our deck.  Now let me tell you  -if you want to test your relationship then just jump right in to a major project like this.  Compounding our effort is the reality that we both have little-to-no abilities with any type of home projects.

Lynn is optimistic: 'It will only take ONE gallon of stain, probably get done in a half day with just ONE initial trip to Lowe’s.  Let's do it ourselves!'  I am more wired to just hire it out to a professional.  'They know what they are doing, have the tools and the time!'  I did not want to do this project.

Couples know the value of compromise, which is how we ended up doing the project ourselves....

Itemized List of our Deck Re-Staining Project:

FIVE gallons of deck stain             $175

SEVEN trips to Lowe's                  70 miles of total driving

Power Paint Sprayer                       $129

Miscellaneous Supplies                  $75

Chiropractor bills                            $500

Divorce Lawyer on Retainer          $25,000

Ha!  Actually we worked well together.  Our pattern in these types of situations is that we end reversing the stereotypical gender roles.  Lynn takes the lead and organizes the project; while I’m the tireless worker drone, ineptly following her around.  Now that I think of it, I never even used our newly purchased Paint Sprayer...

I am thankful to have extended time to work with Lynn and accomplishing some of our household projects...!  

Note: the image of the deck exists only in my mind...

-Now, where is that Ice-Pack and the Advil?

Monday Morning Sabbatical -June 17th, 2013

Bible Cliff Notes, King David and an 8th Grade Graduation

Week two of my Southbrook Summer 2013 Sabbatical is in the books; and what a week it was!

Our son Jacob, graduated from 8th grade and it was exciting to see him walk across the stage at his graduation ceremony.  Of course this means that Lynn and I are getting older, which is exacerbated by the fact that our 13 year old son wears size 12 shoes and is around 6 feet tall.  What happened to how things used to be?!

Truly enjoying the time to be replenished, though sincerely miss the people of Southbrook Church.

Had lunch with my friend Erica, who encouraged me to take some time this summer for a solitude retreat.  So in August I will be spending 5 days alone...  Thanks to generous Church friends who loaned me their cabin!

Blessed to have some time with dear friends John and Dolores.  John was diagnosed with inoperable cancer.  They spoke of their love for God and how He and His people are helping them with the strength that they need.

Spent a day studying doing future sermon preparation.  Looking forward to digging into the Life of David this fall.  Thinking about calling the series: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly.  What do you think?

Enjoyed my time with Pastor Mark, who is the lead pastor at The Ridge Church in Greenfield.  We toured each other’s churches and learned about each others ministries.  Lynn and I went to the Ridge on Sunday and it was great to see a full house of people worshipping and being fed by Pastor Mark.

Thanks to Dr. Evil (you know who you are), for giving me the Cliff Notes of the Bible.  I am sure that this will be a solid assist to me...!  Finally something at my level.

Saw the new Superman Movie with the family.  Didn’t realize that it was going to be a biography.

While driving to the movie on Saturday, we saw groups of people from Southbrook Church outside the Franklin Police Department, serving through our Compassion Weeks.... How wonderful it was to see these men and women serve Jesus by serving the City!

Humbled and Hungry....

Forgetting Your Father ...on Father's Day

I admit, I would rather forget my father on Father’s Day.  


He was a seminary student when I was born, a pastor when I was a child, a President of a Christian Ministry when I was in High School, and a Christian University Trustee when I was an undergraduate.

But most of his life, he was living a lie.

Domestic abuse, substance abuse, absentee father, vindictive boss, self-aggrandizer, and master manipulator.  

The Family Court Judge granted us restraining orders against him, which we carried around for some time.  He died a few years ago, separated from his own family, never having seen his grand kids... 

You can see why I would rather forget my father on Father’s Day.  

God is at work and apparently, has a sense of irony -as now I am a Husband, and Father and a Pastor.  Looking back I have learned a few lessons regarding my father’s life.

There is hope - Life change can occur.  It is laborious and taxing, but with God all things are possible.

His trajectory of life does not have to be yours - God's plan for your life is unique and you will not follow the same pattern of anyone else.

Admit there are pockets of good - There are good times to be remembered for sure, but it is far easier to ignore them.  Being forced to remember something positive humanizes the person who caused so much pain.

It is easier to run from, then to embrace the hardship - While running from hardship is a normal response, it tends to isolate ourselves from a greater reality in which we too can hurt others.

Give yourself grace when you personally fail - My failures do not mean that I am replicating my father's life. We all will fail and extra grace is needed to those who have had such poor role models in life.

Wedding Prayer

Call them old-fashioned, call them antiquated/ traditional, or whatever term you wish; but this photo of about-to-be-married Josh and Bre Curtas is causing quite the commotion.

Josh wanted to pray with Bre before their wedding, so they prayed for the Lord to bless their marriage and their faithfulness to each other.  Bre wrote this about the prayer saying, 'My husband prayed that God would bless our marriage, that through thick or thin together we would never lose hope in one another. That instead of focusing on each others' imperfections we would always rely on Christ’s perfection. That we would wake up every day and choose to love one another not through our own strength but by the power of Christ’s perfect love.'

The New York Daily News and other media outlets picked up the story, putting this photo and their prayer into the national spotlight.  Read it by clicking here

Pastor Fashion Faux Pas

Fashion and I have long been at odds, kind of like the Cubs and .500.  Recently a friend of my wife's told her that she enjoys coming to Southbrook Church because she likes 'my style.'  This brought rolls of laughter from my wife, and a 'hurumph' from me.

Two pairs of pants and a rotation of about seven shirts is about it for me.  Growing up in Church, I've seen it all: dark green suits, brown checked ties, purple pants, and t-shirts that are too tight.

What are some stories of Pastor Fashion Faux Pas' that you've personally experienced?  Share them in the Comments Section below...

Monday Morning Sabbatical -June 10th, 2013

Of Geodes, Friends and Finding True Love....

My first week of Sabbatical is in the books and I think that I have run the entire range of emotions (excitement, fear, exhaustion, thankfulness, and relief).  

Honestly, it has been difficult to disconnect from ministry life.  Partly because serving others is so ingrained into my life, mostly because I love the people who are a part of the Southbrook Community, but realistically it is because I have not wanted to disconnect.

Last week I met my good friend Pastor Pete for breakfast.  For the past few years Pete has been my weekly accountability partner.  I told him that I had planned on returning to Southbrook maybe once each Summer month, just to stop in and worship with everyone.  He challenged my motivations, which I thought were pure (of course, what else could they be!) and asked me if I was planning on returning early to Church because of missing the attention and adulation from our church family....!  What type of accountability partner is it, who asks you these probing questions...?

What are my motivations?  Can I separate my desire to care for the people of Southbrook from my desire to be with the people of Southbrook?  Should I?  This is something I am praying about...

The highlight of the week was a trip that Jacob and I took to rural SouthEastern Iowa, specifically to the small town of Keokuk.  Here my good friend Jason Peterson is the senior pastor of Keokuk Evangelical Free Church.  It was great to worship with him, talk ministry and pastoring, and to participate at his church.  Keokuk is known for its Geodes, small rocks that look ordinary from the outside, but when split in two, reveal worlds of crystalized beauty.  We went Geode hunting with Jason and were able to find some beauties!

Insert great sermon illustration about Geodes -here!

This first week was about enjoying the value of friendship as well as understanding my first love.  In this time of self-reflection I have wondered if I love the people and ministry of Southbrook more than I do the God who has put this all together?!  My prayer is for God to remain my first love and it is my hope that this Sabbatical will help me to that end...

Christians Urged to Boycott Starbucks.... sigh....

This week I came across this headline ‘Activist Urges Faithful to Boycott Starbucks.’ 

Recently Conservative Activist David Barton spoke at the tragically named, ‘Whitesburg Baptist Church’ in Huntsville, Alabama.  Speaking about the topic of Gay Marriage, Barton said this, "The question is, 'Can a Christian give money to a group he knows will use it to attack what God supports?  If you know that when you buy a cup of Starbucks, 5, 10, 15 cents is going to be used to defeat marriage, can you do that? The answer is 'no.'  You can’t drink Starbucks and be biblically right.’ ”

I think it is time to boycott boycotts, and here’s why:

• Boycotts rarely achieve their stated goals.
• Boycotts are almost always self-serving.  Even failed boycotts are viewed as successful- because they add credibility and status to the leader of the boycott.
• Boycotts tempt Christians into using economic and commercial methods to accomplish spiritual goals.
• Boycotts paint Christians as reactionary, fear-based, and short-sighted.

Followers of God have long battled the Siren’s call of using earthly power to accomplish spiritual goals.  Consistently the Scriptures show God urging His people to reject earthly power and human alliances and instead trust fully in Him.  Maybe instead of protesting, Christians should try modeling Christ to a world in desperate need of authentic Christ followers.  By rejecting the power-over model used effectively by groups and alliances -Christians should embrace path of downward-mobility modeled by Christ.

Maybe instead of boycotting Starbucks, we should pick up the tab of the person behind us in line...

Maybe it is time to boycott, boycotts...

Christians Negatively Portrayed by the Media? This American Life's Ira Glass Says 'Yes'

In a recent video interview, Ira Glass host of Public Radio's This American Life, gave an interview describing how Christians are negatively portrayed in the media.

Glass is known for his clever insights into American culture- combining his acerbic wit and everyman approach to storytelling.  He has publicly rejected his family's Jewish heritage -embracing Atheism.

The five minute interview can be watched by  Clicking Here

Do you agree with Glass's insights into how Christians are portrayed in the Media?